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Frau Schaub came as an ambassador bringing flowers and telegrams. The result is that my whole office resembles a flower shop and smells like a cemetery chapel.
God, I am afraid he won’t give me his answer today. If only somebody would help me – it is all so terribly depressing.
He came on Saturday. Saturday evening there was the Town Ball. Frau Schwarz gave me a box, so I absolutely had to go after I had accepted. Well, I spent a few wonderfully delightful hours with him until 12 o’clock and then with his permission I spent two h
He came to see me, but nary a sign of a dog or a chest of drawers. He did not even ask me what I wanted for my birthday. So I bought some jewelry for myself. A necklace, earrings, and a matching ring, all for 50 marks. All very pretty, and I hope he likes
He has so often told me he is madly in love with me, but what does that mean when I haven’t had a good word from him in three months?
He only needs me for certain purposes, otherwise it is not possible. This is idiocy.
I am racking my brains to find out why he left without saying good-by to me.
I am so infinitely happy that he loves me so much, and I pray that it will always be like this. It won’t be my fault if he ever stops loving me.
I have made up my mind to take 35 pills this time, and it will be “dead certain.” If only he would let someone call.”
I have now reached the happy age of 23. No, happy is not quite the right word. At this particular moment I am certainly not happy.
I sat with him for three hours and we did not exchange a single word. At the end he handed me, as he had done before, an envelope with money in it. It would have been much nicer if he had enclosed a greeting or a loving word. I would have been so pleased i
In the end we went to the railroad station, as he suddenly decided he would have to go. We were just in time to see the last lights of the train disappearing. Once again Hoffmann left the house too late, and so I couldn’t even say good-by to him. Perhaps I
On Sunday he promised I could see him. I telephoned to the Osteria and left a message with Werlin to say that I was waiting to hear from him. He simply went off to Feldafing, and refused Hoffmann’s invitation to coffee and dinner. I suppose there are two s
Perhaps he wanted to be alone with Dr. G., who was here, but he should have let me know. At Hoffmann’s I felt I was sitting on hot coals, expecting him to arrive every moment.
So he has had a head full of politics all this time, but surely it is time he relaxed a little. What happened last year? Didn’t Roehm and Italy give him a lot of problems, but in spite of all that he found time for me.
There is only one thing I want. I would like to be seriously ill, and to hear nothing more about him for at least a week. Why doesn’t something happen to me? Why do I have to go through all this? If only I had never set eyes on him!
Today I bought two lottery tickets, because I had a feeling that it would be now or never – they were both blanks. So I am not going to be rich after all. Nothing at all to be done about it.
We’ll see. If I don’t get an answer before this evening, I’ll take 25 pills and gently fall asleep into another world.
What is important is not to give up hope. I should have learned to be patient by now.
When he says he loves me, it only means he loves me at that particular instant. Like his promises, which he never keeps. Why does he torment me like this, when he could finish it off at once?
Why doesn’t that Devil take me with him? It would be much better with him than it is here.
나에게 개가 있다면 외로움을 타지 않을것이다, 그러나 너무나 많은 요구를 하는거겟지?
이종환
35년 동안 방송을 했지만 상식에 어긋난 행동을 한 적은 없다. 게시판에 뜬 청취자들의 지적에 신경쓰지 않는다.
XX 호텔에 가봤냐고. 창피하군. (내가) 어제 거기서 잤잖아
가슴이 많이 아팠어요. 무대에 서니까 빈자리가 먼저 보이고. 사고만 없었으면 훨씬 잘 됐을텐데…. 출연해준 가수들에게 너무 미안했죠.”
그럼 안 들으면 되지
대신 하고싶은 것도, 할 수 있는 것도 없다
목포는 여자들도 예쁘고….. 왜 예쁘다는 말에 대답을 안 해?
목포에서 방송하면 받는 돈으로 사는 데 지장 없냐
방송에서 술에 취했다고 말한 것은 재미있으라고 한 말이었다. 술에 취해서 방송하지 않았다.
방송하고 얼마 받느냐? 한 500만원 받느냐? 그정도 못 받지?
변명의 여지도 없습니다. 이대로 물러나겠습니다. 많이 욕해 주십시오. 달게 받겠습니다.
아주 냉혹한 곳이죠, 방송사는. 청취율이 그나마 높게 나오니까 사람들이 선배라고 불러주지 그렇지 않으면 누가 거들떠나 보겠어요
오래 전부터 <라디오시대>는 제가 있어야 할 곳이 아닌 것 같다는 생각이었어요. 두 사람이 진행하면 하나는 정상적이고 하나는 바보짓을 해야 재미있죠. 그러니 제가 어릿광대 노릇을 해야했죠. 제 본업은 음악인데…
요즘은 가수들과 음악에 대해 직접 이야기하기도 쉽지 않더군요. 다들 매니저에게 이야기하라고 하고. 만나면 인사야 ‘늘어지게’ 하죠. 사람사는 게 다 그렇죠.
유달산은 가봤냐. 여자랑 가봤냐고.
이명박 서울시장이 수해지역에 사는 주민들에게 전세자금을 빌려주기로 했다. 말이라도 얼마나 속이 시원하냐.
이회창 한나라당 후보의 아들 정연씨의 병역비리 의혹을 둘러싼 공방이 지겹다. 테이프가 있으면 내놔보라.
인성이 중요하다. 인성을 잘 키워야 방송을 잘한다.
저는 아직도 술이 안 깼습니다.
정부가 공적자금을 잘못 운영해 국민 한명당 200만원씩 물게 됐다. 나라가 살림을 잘못해 국민이 고생한다.
제가 굴러온 복을 차버린 거죠.
제가 늘 음주운전 안된다고 말하다 이런 꼴이 됐으니 이번 기회에 정말 방송에서 손을 떼야겠다고 생각했어요. 그게 청취자들에게 배신감을 조금이나마 덜어드리는 일인 것 같아서…
지금 어디 살아요? 아파트? 28평? 괜찮네. 허허
지금도 돈 내고 표 사는 사람이 있다더라. 국회의원 뽑아봤자 배신감만 생길 뿐이다.
청취자 여러분이 느끼셨을 배신감을 생각하면 그야말로 쥐구멍에라도 숨고싶은 마음입니다